My Boyfriend is Better Than Coffee

2nd September 2011

One of the questions I ask a prospective PA when I interview them is, ‘Are you a morning person?’ Because, well, because I am not.

Like most people who are honest with themselves, I cannot speak without bumping into a cup of coffee in the morning. On days that aren’t weekends, there isn’t time to make zombie coffee using our Italian coffee machine, so I kid myself with the most drinkable instant I can find, or buy a coffee on the way to my day-job.

But like I said, pre-coffee Lorna (me) is vastly different from post-coffee Lorna (also me, because I’m good like that.) This is usually true 365 days of the year, but yesterday was slightly different.

I had slept through the first alarm, and Sarge forgot to set the second one, therefore my wake-up call was my PA downstairs buzzing to get in. Usually I have time to put my monosyllables in some semblance of understandable order. Yesterday, I did not. I even scared myself, I grunted my way through a shower, making it last as long as possible. I could not even make the small-talk necessary when someone other boyfriend has to see me naked.

There was still nothing as I shrugged into clothes, and spritzed myself with expensive-but-somehow-on-sale perfume.

And then Sarge walked in from the shower, somehow looking more put-together than myself. I managed to to mumble ‘excuse me’ to my PA, and turned to him saying, ‘Hug me, please. I’m all discombobulated.’ That was a lot of syllables. My brain almost fizzed. We hugged, and as if by magic, (pun may be intended), my monosyllabic grumbles turned into pleasant-sounding sentences. My boyfriend is better than coffee. Yes, I said it! If that’s too much information, then I’m sorry. But than, love means never having to say you’re sorry. So maybe I’m not.

Yesterday, at about three o’clock, staring at my emails and my Outlook diary, I could have used a Sarge-hug, but I had coffee instead. Somehow it wasn’t the same.

Yes, even this coffee. Maybe. This isn't the one I had yesterday.

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  • Reply Sharon 2nd September 2011 at 2:06 pm

    I love your boyfriend. I’d tell you more about how much I love your relationship but I haven’t had coffee yet. And I have no idea what my fingers are actually tyyping.

    • Reply LKD 2nd September 2011 at 7:56 pm

      I love my boyfriend, too! Feel free to say more once you’ve had coffee. I’m here all week. Longer than that, but, y’know…:)

  • Reply emilydev9 3rd September 2011 at 12:34 pm

    Sarge is great. I agree, he’s better than coffee. It’s ok, though, if you don’t want to choose between them.

    Wait, what’s that baked item next to the coffee…?

  • Reply Carol 5th September 2011 at 3:20 pm

    I was never a morning person, but as I add years to my life resume I am becoming one. My furry alarm clocks are making that necessary to some degree, but now I find constructive stuff must be done before 10:00 or it’s just not going to happen. After 10:00 and I’m in playtime mode. Result? You can write your name on my furniture, proving you’re literate.

    • Reply LKD 5th September 2011 at 3:27 pm

      Actual laugh-out-loud, Carol! Thank you for that.

  • Reply Amber West 7th September 2011 at 6:15 pm

    That is so sweet. And I want that coffee. 🙂

  • Reply Bella 8th September 2011 at 3:16 am

    That Sarge hug must be one heck of a hug if it trumps coffee! I hear you in regard to not being a morning person. I need at least two cups before I’m able to grunt some sort of reply and look less scary! 🙂 That coffee looks amazing!

  • Reply Mama Bread Baker 17th September 2011 at 2:38 am

    I must have my coffee in the morning as well! I recall once being out of coffee and my then boyfriend had disappeared from the house. He returned shortly with a steaming cup of Java from the corner gas station. I said, “Oh, how sweeeeet.” He replied, “I didn’t do it for you….I did it for me.” Hmmmmm, am I really THAT grumpy? Yeah….. 🙂

  • Reply adelspeaks 18th September 2011 at 4:34 pm

    You are so sweet 🙂 Loves 🙂

  • Reply Give Me Your Best Shot « Gin & Lemonade 28th December 2011 at 4:32 pm

    […] September, I left my phone at work.  Hilarity ensued.  Apparently.  I may have also said my boyfriend is better than coffee.  Maybe.  OK, I did.  I also stayed on Island Number 3 of […]

  • Reply How Are You Doing? | Gin & Lemonade 20th April 2012 at 7:54 pm

    […] I’ve said some pretty provocative things.  I admitted that grew up thinking Nina Simone was a man, and I once proclaimed my boyfriend-turned-fiancé is better than coffee. […]

  • Reply limebirdbeth 23rd April 2012 at 12:13 pm

    I clicked on this post from your other one… but I agree that hugs can wake you up. I don’t drink any caffeine in the morning (probably one of the only people in the world that can say this!) well, I don’t really drink any during the day either… but I do get a hug every morning and that seems to do the trick! 🙂

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