Sarge and I sent a few overseas and faraway invitations on Saturday. We went across the street to the post office, with me actually praying that I wouldn’t drop them.
We arrived safely at the post office and with each PAR AVION stamp applied; I dug my nails deeper into his shirt. This was not a metaphor for anything. Or a comment on the fact that we are suddenly more engaged now than before. I was just counting. Really hard.
However, when we dropped the stamped addressed envelopes into the somehow really bright red post box, I said, ‘It’s official now, unless you want to tip the box.’
‘But I did fall out of the chair that one time.’
‘No more tipping.’
When we got the samples, I was excited to read the details of strangers’ weddings. It’s even more mind-blowing to see our own names on there. Weird to think of those cards on their way to other people’s hands and hearts and houses.
I lay awake at 5.38 yesterday morning, wondering what people would think of the ‘no hat’ rule.
In the middle of the invite, in not-so small print it reads: Dress: Scottish traditional (no hats). I don’t like hats. Because I have a big American head.
When I brought up this point with my mother, she said, ‘What does that mean?’
‘If at all possible, men in kilts and no hats on anyone.’
‘But you can’t tell people what to wear.’
‘Other couples specify Black Tie. And I don’t like hats. Same thing.’
‘If you don’t like hats, then don’t wear one. It is not the same thing. And I want to wear one of those fascinating things. Like Fergie’s girls.’
‘You mean a fascinator? Please don’t.’
‘Whatever. One with feathers on it.’
‘That would be fascinating. Just don’t wear it at my wedding.’
‘I just might.’
‘Look, even my future mother-in-law doesn’t like hats. She appreciates the rule, Mom.’
‘Oh, really? That’s useful for you. Go with it.’
Having said all that, this post on big hats almost makes me want to change my mind. Almost. But not quite. And anyway, the invitations are printed already. It’s official now. No tipping.
What are your opinions on big hats and preferred wedding dress-codes?
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