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Instant Coffee Tastes Like Mushrooms

14th April 2012

I’ll repeat, instant coffee taste like mushrooms.  Fact.  That’s why, as I write this, there is a cup of zombie coffee by my side.  Anyway, these are, as ever, coffee-fuelled ramblings.

And so, this week, I went out for more real coffee with a friend.  I discovered many things:

  1.  It’s OK that I can’t get through five pages of Saturday or Enduring Love.  It isn’t just me.
  2. Apparently, I can’t go five minutes without talking about THE WEDDING.  And that’s OK.  But somehow less universal an issue than the density of Ian McEwan’s prose.

I’m going to be bold.  This post is not about THE WEDDING.  It’s not about the bike, either.  Or the shoes.  It’s about OTHER THINGS.

I’ve been writing a lot.  My last piece was rejected.  I’ve been trying to find words for this.  It sucks.  That’s two words.  Empty gaping hole.  There’s three more.  In all seriousness, this last knock sent me into a darkened room.  Really.  That’s where Sarge found me when he got home from work.  I tried to switch the light on, though.  And then I threw up.

And so, if I’m not talking about THE WEDDING, I’m talking about THE BIG FAT ‘NO’.  Or not talking about it.  I have since left the darkened room.  To watch Judge Judy.  Or The Sopranos.  Or this video.  Over and over.

Getting back to The Sopranos, Sarge and I are working through the box-set.  Two episodes left.  When the show was first on, I refused to watch the end.  I like to think the characters from my favourite shows live on in some funky parallel universe.  Which is kinda apt.  Because they’re ACTORS.

Coffee cup

Coffee cup (Photo credit: @Doug88888)

I’m planning a post that lists my favourite episodes of The Sopranos.  I’ll give you a hint.  Christopher is my favourite character.  So THAT ONE won’t be on the list.  I guess I’ve always had a thing for guys with big noses.

Which reminds me of THE WEDDING.  But that’s another post.

And that was six minutes.  Which is more than five.

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  • Reply madamesaslow 14th April 2012 at 5:00 pm

    I used to write a lot of poetry. I would submit it to magazines and online ‘zines, hoping to get published. I never felt more like a real artist as the day I got my first rejection letter. It was glorious. I felt like a REAL writer. Getting published seemed secondary. I was a weird kid, though.

  • Reply transparentguy 14th April 2012 at 5:06 pm

    The only way to deal with instant coffee is to treat it like the Israelis do: boil a cup of milk, add a spoonful of the instant coffee and a spoonful of sugar.

    • Reply LKD 16th April 2012 at 8:56 am

      I shall have to try it that way, thanks!

  • Reply becomingcliche 14th April 2012 at 10:30 pm

    There’s a website that has copies of rejection letters that now-famous authors received. Maybe one day you can frame yours and have a good laugh. Until then, I’ll just say I’m sorry they said no. It does suck.

    • Reply LKD 15th April 2012 at 11:21 am

      Where’s that site? It wil become my new favourite! 🙂

  • Reply Sara 16th April 2012 at 9:26 pm

    Instant is the majority of the coffee available in Chile because it’s cheap. I used to think it tasted awful, too. Now, I’m sort of a connoisseur 😉 Thanks for stopping by on my SITS day!

  • Reply thoughtsappear 25th April 2012 at 1:10 pm

    I’m sorry that your writing was rejected. Don’t give up!

    I’m not a coffee drinker, but every once in awhile I think I should give it another try. Then you compared it to mushrooms. I think I’ll pass on the coffee for a little while longer.

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