My Top 10 Blog Posts on Disability

I started this blog to share my real, regular life as a disabled person.

I travelled, I tried to write, I got married, and had a kid. The fact that I’m a wheelchair user makes life interesting, but not undoable.

I don’t try to overcome my disability, I prefer to work with it.

I don’t want to undo my Cerebral Palsy, a positive outlook won’t change it, and I don’t want to. I am disabled and proud.

My frustrations spring from inaccessible buildings, closed-mindedness, and the opposite of inclusion.

On this blog, my wheels weave into everyday life. I don’t mention them in every post for a few reasons.

I don’t think about my wheels every day. They are a fact. Like my big hair and my dirty laugh. A part of me that mostly isn’t any bigger than the other parts.

I mentioned my wheelchair on my About page, and wrote about the rest of my life.

When I redesigned the blog, I added an Author photo on the sidebar that includes my wheels.

I began to write about my disability more often.

Several people responded: I didn’t know you used a chair.

And that worried me for a few reasons. I’m not exactly quiet about it, or sad about it.

Am I being authentic in my writing if some my readers haven’t figured out a big piece of who I am? Am I the advocate I think I am, the person I’ve always been, if people don’t realize I’m disabled?

It’s not a compliment to me to be told you didn’t know, or that you forget. In fact, it makes me think the whole blog isn’t working.

Last week, while looking up something else, I realized Gin & Lemonade hit 500 posts. Number 500 was about missing a writing deadline. Not about disability.

I was kind of mad at myself that the original point of my blog has been lost. Even though I am trying to write more, so keep reading for writerly posts.

In terms of sharing my real, regular life, this week a jar of hot sauce exploded in my fridge, and my kid was home with a stomach bug, because nursery school is a cesspool of germs.

I’ve wheeled through my days from the kitchen to Isla camped out in my bedroom.

On one particular loop, I heard a sound. I pushed through it. I heard the sound again.

An actual squeaky front wheel. Slow your roll, indeed.

I went to Neil’s office.

‘Oil can,’ I said, which is code for breaking out the WD – 40.

I transferred to the couch, Isla danced around, and my PA brought me my lunch.

Now some of you may remember the last time I wrote about zen and the art of wheelchair maintenance.

This time, Neil flipped the chair, took the wheel off, and cleaned it out. He hadn’t put it back on, when work called.

‘I’ll be back’, Neil says. Not like Arnold.

And so, my chair is upside down, and I’m on the couch. I’m explaining to my new PA that frozen wheels are actually not an everyday occurrence. Hi.

I used the time to tackle hug Isla because we were kinda at the same eye level.

‘Now, can you get on the floor and hide under the table with me?’

‘Um, no.’

I also used my off road time to think about my answers to the Disabled Blogger Tag from Elin at My Blurred World.

Now, I don’t do tags very often, I find most of them to be pointless chain letter type things.

But when you find one in your niche, and I’ve decided I do have one of those, I guess it’s a good idea to play along.

1. WHEN AND WHY DID YOU START YOUR BLOG?

In 2010, to share my thoroughly regular life on wheels. Also wanted to highlight instances of inaccessibility in a humorous way. Because lack of access is actually bullshit.

DID YOU INTEND TO TALK ABOUT YOUR DISABILITY ONLINE FROM THE BEGINNING?

Yes. Kind of unavoidable, and I’m not ashamed. We can also get into a discussion about how I am mostly disabled by society, and my medical condition is not my issue.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SKEPTICAL ABOUT TALKING ABOUT YOUR DISABILITY ONLINE?

I’m more outspoken in real life, and I wish it translated to the blog more often.

WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE HAVE YOU/DO YOU RECEIVE IN TERMS OF YOUR DISABILITY RELATED BLOG POSTS?

My favorite connections happen when something I’ve written resonates with other disabled people. While I appreciate all my readers, my life is not a lesson to non-disabled people.

DO YOU WRITE/TALK ABOUT OTHER TOPICS APART FROM YOUR DISABILITY?

Yes, but everything is through my lens on wheels. There’s the road trips and the travelling, and the parenting, and the reading, and trying to write.

WHAT STEPS DO YOU TAKE TO MAKE YOUR BLOG ACCESSIBLE TO YOURSELF AS WELL AS OTHER PEOPLE?

I’ve tried to make my fonts larger, and work on my image descriptions. I’m looking into audio versions and maybe a podcast.

If there’s anything else I can do, please let me know.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE THING ABOUT BLOGGING ABOUT YOUR DISABILITY?

Connecting with other disabled people.

Also, conversations like this:

Me: Do you think of us as a non-traditional, unique family?

Neil: We’re a family. That’s it.

WHAT ARE YOUR TOP THREE FAVORITE DISABILITY RELATED BLOG POSTS THAT YOU’VE EVER PUBLISHED?

I’m actually gonna go with my top 10 disability posts, because there’s over 500 around here:

10. Talking To My Kid About Disability – How my kid explains her mother to other kids.

9. 12 Things To Say When Someplace Is Inaccessible – consider it a template. Or something.

8. I’m Not Angry Enough – about inaccessible places.

7. Disabled Parenting Problems – which will become a series.

6. That’s Just How I Roll: Thoughts On Inspiration – That’s also about the media representation of disabled people.

5. My Wedding Dress, My Wheelchair, & Me – Pretty self-explanatory.

4a. Disabled People Need Access, Not Backpacks – About the hero worship of people who help us climb mountains, instead of promoting accessible travel. That piece recently knocked down 4b. When The Accessible Hotel Room Is Inaccessible – Where I talked about a not so positive travel moment.

3. My Flat Ass: What Disability Means To Me – You might want to read that one, too.

2. I’m A Wheelchair User, And Waking Is Not My Goal, began as another conversation with my daughter about self-acceptance and other interestingness.

That post edged out A Day In My Life As A Disabled Mother – which is the one that kind of pushed me to be more honest in my sharing of the everyday as it was before we moved, so it’s kind of fitting.

and number 1 is:

Disability Representation And Why I Bought A Barbie In My 30s – I wrote this as a background post after a post of mine went viral on Facebook. A memory and a message. This one was written in 2019, and is now my most popular disability-centric blog post of all-time.

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DO YOU THINK THAT THE DISABLED BLOGGER/YOUTUBER COMMUNITY IS OVERLOOKED?

Yes, but for my part as a blog reader, perhaps I read the wrong people.

DO YOU FIND IT DIFFICULT TO THINK OF NEW DISABILITY RELATED CONTENT TO PUBLISH?

Yes and no. My blog writing is mostly disabled lifestyle stuff, recently. Barring squeaky wheels and pretending I sleep well, my wheels are everywhere with me. So not hard to write about them.

DO YOU THINK THAT BLOGGING ABOUT YOUR DISABILITY HELPS TO CHANGE PEOPLE’S PERCEPTIONS?

Well, most people I know also know that disabled people are just like everyone else, and that we shouldn’t be seen as examples for non-disabled people on how to live.

Saying that, if my writing can makes other disabled people feel less alone and frustrated, that’s why I do it.

Consider me a ramp in a world full of stairs. Or something.

I’m not gonna tag anyone else, but I’d like to share other writing about and from writers I admire.

Rubella gave me a disability. This is my message to anti-vaxxers –

When I write my coffee talk posts, Elsa is one of the friends I am writing to. And I want to write like her when I grow up.

Carrie Ann Lucas Was A BAMF –

When I was pregnant with Isla, I read obsessively on disabled parents rights, and Carrie Ann’s name was the one I read the most. I never met her, or wrote her a thank you letter, but I wish I had.

12 Frustrations of Being A Wheelchair User –

Because. All. Of. This.

What it’s really like to fly as a wheelchair user – All of this, too. And it reminded me of interestingness of travels past.

But that’s another post.

If you’re a disabled blogger, I’d love to read your answers to these questions, and I thank Elin for starting the tag.